Let's Watch This... Again: An Episode of "Sidekick"

NOTE: Please do not take any of the little nitpicks in this review (or any of my other reviews, for that matter) seriously. I write these reviews in the hopes of making people laugh. Those nitpicks are really just dumb little observations that I'm attempting to make jokes out of, not complaints that add to whether or not I like something.

NOTE #2: No disrespect is meant towards anyone who worked on the show I am reviewing today. I'm sure they are all very nice and talented people.

NOTE #3: If you like this show, that is great. Go ahead and like it. I'm not judging you.

Y'know what we haven't done on this blog in a while? A re-review!

Sidekick, created by Todd Kauffman and Joey So for Nelvana, does have a great premise for a cartoon: after so many cartoons about superheroes, how about one about superheroes' SIDEKICKS? Sure, Robin already got his time in the spotlight as the leader of the Teen Titans, but aside from that, there hasn't been much focus on the superheroes' faithful young companions. In this show, kids go to a school called the Academy For Aspiring Sidekicks and learn how to be sidekicks.

The main character, Eric Needles (voiced by Miklos Perlus), is the sidekick of superhero Maxum Man (Ron Pardo), who is currently missing. His best friends are the dimwitted villain's henchman wannabe Trevor Troublemeyer (Christian Potejza), the vain and bossy Vana Glama (Stephanie Anne Mills) who Eric totally has the hots for even though she can't stand him, and Kitty Ko (Denise Oliver), a sweet-natured and highly-intelligent Asian girl who is desperately in love with Eric but he's too stupid to notice, and who I also found to be the best character on the show, the only one I actually kind of liked, and the one who I thought would make a much better protagonist. Other characters include headmaster Professor Pamplemoose (Patrick McKenna) and Maxum Man's sentient computer Maxum Brain (Tony Daniels).

I will say in Sidekick's defense that it has more going for it than something like Scaredy Squirrel or Spliced. However, I wasn't that impressed by the previous episode of the show I watched. But who knows? Maybe I'll like this one better. We're going to watch the thirty-seventh episode of the show, which consists of the segments "The Land Before Grunk" and "I, Sidebot". This is Sidekick... again.

Our first segment is "The Land Before Grunk". It begins with Eric's class learning about the world's first supervillain, Grunk, via a puppet show. No one could stop Grunk because he had an army of dinosaurs (who could apparently breathe fire, unless whoever's putting on this puppet show thinks that dinosaurs and dragons are the same thing)... until Maxum Man arrived. Seeing as Professor Pamplemoose says that Grunk was around millions of years ago, Maxum Man must be tremendously old.

And if that puppet is any indication, he's aged tremendously well!

Using his prehistoric freeze breath, Maxum Man froze Grunk for all of eternity... or until a really hot day, at least. Then, Professor Pamplemoose tells the class that he's going to take them all on a field trip to see Grunk... after a grueling three-hour bus ride through the desert.

Wait, the frozen supervillain is currently being held in a DESERT? Y'know, a place where it gets very, very HOT? Where there's a pretty good chance that the ice containing him could MELT? That's like trapping Hansel and Gretel in a prison cell made of gingerbread.

Just curious, do they ever explain why Pamplemoose has green skin?

Apparently, whoever chose to place the frozen Grunk in a desert wasn't so stupid after all - he's hidden in an ice cave, which deserts do indeed sometimes have (often formed in lava tubes). Since Eric and Trevor were asleep during the puppet show, they have no idea what they're even doing in the desert, much to Pamplemoose's ire. If Grunk were freed, he claims, they would all be doomed and cavemen and dinosaurs would roam the earth once again. Wouldn't it just be one cavemen, or does Grunk have a bunch of brothers frozen in ice too?

Well, anyway, as his classmates head to the gift shop, Eric stupidly decides to throw a small rock at the frozen Grunk. And even though his rock-throwing skills are miniscule, it does cause a crack to start forming in the ice. A few seconds later...

Jeez, we're already three minutes in and already chaos has ensued. Pacing is a thing, guys.

"THANKS, DUMB-SHAPED KID, FOR RELEASING GRUNK," Grunk tells Eric from atop his tyrannosaurus rex (yes, yes, dinosaurs and cavemen did not co-exist, it's a cartoon, they can take some historic liberties). Upon hearing that, Vana has to be restrained from punching Eric... and, honestly, while it has been previously established that Vana has anger issues, I don't blame her for wanting to clobber him. Then Grunk steals Eric's sandwich, which makes Kitty MAD! "Nobody steals from my Eric!" she declares... even if Eric has a habit of getting her name wrong. As those of you who read my previous review of the show might recall, Eric is a tool.

Huh, Grunk has green skin too. I wonder if he's Pamplemoose's ancestor or something.

Then we get two disgusting jokes in a row! First of all, Grunk falls in love with Kitty. Reminder, he's a million-year-old caveman and she's... at least twelve, right? This is all sorts of wrong. Then we get a joke involving Trevor FARTING IN KITTY'S FACE. Ew.

Even Bee Movie was a better love story than this!

Grunk promptly kidnaps Kitty, and her friends pursue him in Maxum Man's car... I guess Eric already has a driver's license even though he's... again, at least twelve. "You've just stolen my one true love!" Eric shouts. Of course, he's not referring to Kitty. He's referring to the sandwich. Honestly, Kitty, what do you see in this guy? On the bright side, Eric does promptly get stomped on and then eaten by the t-rex.

Hooray! This means Kitty can be the new protagonist!

And because Trevor is a tool too, his reaction to seeing his best friend get eaten is to cheerfully say, "Cool!" Kitty demands that Grunk bring Eric back ASAP, so the t-rex barfs Eric out. I'm sorry, but I still find it really disturbing that Grunk is in love with someone who's clearly a teenager at the oldest. They really didn't think this plot point through, did they?

Vana is annoyed that Grunk is attracted to Kitty instead of her, because apparently she has a thing for cavepeople? And Eric's still more upset over the sandwich than he is over Kitty being kidnapped. Kitty needs to get some better friends.

While Eric and Trevor are working on a plan to stop Grunk, poor Kitty is trapped in a cage being hit on by someone several decades older than she is. Eventually, Eric and Trevor show up, dressed in Maxum Man costumes. But Grunk has an ultimate weapon he can use against them. Y'know how owls often cough up pellets with mouse bones and stuff in 'em after they eat? Well, t-rexes do that too... or maybe it's actually just their poop. Either way, disgusting.

Jeez, how many people have those t-rexes eaten? Maybe now we know what happened
to Maxum Man...

Eric and Trevor dodge the t-rex crap, and Grunk... gets confused and gives up. Normally, I'd complain about this being anti-climactic, but there are two reasons why I won't. First of all, if the alternative is him throwing more poop at them, I'll gladly take this instead. Second, HE might be giving up, but the t-rexes aren't.

It initially seems like the t-rexes eat Eric and Trevor, but instead they just put them in the cage with Kitty. But when Eric sees that Grunk still has his stupid sandwich... who is he, the Rob Paulsen-voiced alien from Lilo and Stitch: The Series?

Anyway, he gets an idea: he calls up Vana, but she refuses, even though these are her BEST FRIENDS. What, is she still bitter that Grunk didn't fall head over heels in love with HER? I'd say you dodged a bullet, Vana. Fortunately, Eric gets another idea. He tells Vana that, actually, they don't need her, they have Kitty, who's so much braver and smarter and better than she is (I mean, he's not wrong). Sure enough...

"Yabba-dabba-doo, punks!"

Vana manages to defeat the t-rexes - and even BLOWS ONE UP FROM THE INSIDE, maybe that's just the animal-lover in me talking but I find that pretty gruesome. "EAT ICE, CAVEMAN!" she shouts before zapping Grunk with her freeze-gun, trapping him in ice once again... and also Eric, Trevor, and Kitty as well. Oh, and Eric's precious sandwich, can't forget THAT.

"I WAS FROZEN TODAY!"

I'm going to assume that Vana eventually came back and freed Eric, Trevor and Kitty with an ice pick, because all three of them are okay in the next segment...

Today, the class has a guest speaker: this old guy who tells them that they won't have to risk life and limb assisting superheroes anymore. He picks up one kid and starts using him to wipe his butt... ANOTHER thing that is wrong on a number of levels...

He introduces Laser-Operating Individual Digital Sidekicks (L.O.I.D.S. for short). They're flying robots that will be assisting the superheroes instead of the sidekicks. Pamplemoose dubs the students obselete and closes the academy.

It should be pretty obvious why I chose to review this episode in particular. Nowadays, companies are obsessed with AI and want to use it to replace human employees - ESPECIALLY those that work in the animation industry. At some point, I might wind up reviewing a cartoon made or written entirely by AI. I really hope everyone calms down about AI before that happens, but something tells me this episode is going to serve as a cautionary tale that nobody listened to. By the way, I never use AI when writing my blog posts - so if you see a spelling error, a grammar error, or a joke that's not funny in the slightest, that's on me.

I guess the appeal of AI for these companies is that you don't have to pay it like you do
employees. Because I'm sure it's SUCH A HASSLE for Disney, the company that makes billions
of dollars a year, to pay their animators, rihgt?

Unlike all the other students, Eric is THRILLED that he's been replaced by a robot. Kitty is dismayed because if the school closes, how will she see Eric? He suggests that she can just visit the mansion, which gives Kitty the idea to sneak into the mansion while Eric is sleeping and... capture his farts in a jar?

Okay, Kitty, you're still the best character on the show, but this is a big no-no.

Why would she even WANT his farts, anyway?

"I won't stand for this! No machine can replace ME!" Vana declares. But Eric is still thrilled - now they won't have to fail tests and put their lives in danger... but then it occurs to him that if he's not a sidekick, he might not be able to live in the Maxum Mansion anymore. He'll have to go back to the orphanage! And he's so tired of singing "It's the Hard-Knock Life"!

Sure enough, Maxum Brain tells Eric when he gets home that he's no longer staying in the mansion. Now he'll have to go stay with Trevor, who's started invention EEEEEEEEEEVIL things like a "funday device" that spreads doom in a "fun way". Even ignoring that, bunking with Trevor probably isn't the best idea, what with his pet gargoyles around too.

Note to self: review Gargoyles at some point...

After recruiting Kitty's help and getting Eric's clothes back off-camera (they were previously taken by Maxum Brain because they were property of Maxum Man or whatever, hence why he was shirtless in the previous screencap), Eric and Trevor go visit Vana, who has calmed down by doing light reading, knitting, and making exact replicas of the L.O.I.D.S. out of her earwax. Yeah, it should be pretty obvious that she's basically a ticking timebomb - and when Eric asks for her help, she snaps like a twig and suddenly becomes incredibly buff.

SOMEONE's been skipping Leg Day.

"THOSE ROBOTS DON'T STAND A CHANCE!" Eric shouts... only for him and his friends to learn the hard way that they do. One of the L.O.I.D.S. effortlessly ties them to a lamppost. "CURSE THESE BRUTAL MECHANICAL MARVELS!" Kitty exclaims, prompting the L.O.I.D.S. to at least give her a pillow. But what's this? The superheroes of their town have shown up to save the day! Even THEY know that robots can't replace REAL sidekicks! Hooray!

Oh, wait. Never mind. The L.O.I.D.S. tie up the superheroes too.

I want to know more about the blonde-haired cyclops girl. What's HER story?

"There's only one thing left to do!" Eric says - NOT invent yogurt shoes, like Trevor guesses, but go to the evil side of town and enlist the help of the worst supervillain the world has ever known! Who could that be? Lex Luthor? Doctor Octopus? Elon Musk?

Nope, it's this guy named XOX (Ron Rubin) - the evil alter-ego of Trevor's father. He explains that since the L.O.I.D.S. replaced all the superheroes and sidekicks and took the fun out of being bad, he decided to quit villainy and start a band! I assume his bandmates are recurring villains who appeared in other episodes of the show.

I want to know about the green-skinned muscle-bound guy on the drums, too.

Eric and the others manage to play XOX like a fiddle and get him to help them take down the L.O.I.D.S. - in turn, he enlists the help of every other supervillain in town. And so the L.O.I.D.S. are defeated and the day is saved.

Just kidding. The L.O.I.D.S. are too powerful for THEM, too.

The words "EPIC FAIL" are coming to mind...

Since the L.O.I.D.S. are unstoppable, everyone decides to pack up, leave the city and build a new one where they can continue their superhero/supervillain/sidekick thing and never speak of the L.O.I.D.S. again. Huzzah! Of course, Trevor stupidly suggests that maybe they should build robots to do their work for them. I expected everyone to slap him for being such an idiot or at least shout "NOOOOOOOOO!" at the top of their lungs, but nope, everyone starts to think it over.

So I guess this implies that they're going to do the episode over and over again - build robots, find themselves unable to defeat them, leave town and build another one, lather, rinse, repeat.

What's the Verdict?

I'm still gonna have to put Sidekick in the mediocre category. I actually think one of the segments in the previous episode I reviewed, "Match Dot Com", was better than either of the episodes I reviewed here. There's only so many times you can say that Kitty is the only likeable character or that most of the jokes (mainly the ones involving Trevor) aren't funny before the review starts to become repetitive. Good voice acting and the occasional clever gag - I particularly like how the episode ends with them abandoning the town and building another one, even if it's a bit of an anti-climax - save the show from being a complete waste of time, but I still wouldn't recommend watching it.

Incidentally, y'know how I keep saying that the show would be better if Kitty were the protagonist? According to Wikipedia and TV Tropes, she WAS originally supposed to be the protagonist. Why'd they change it? We don't even NEED Eric, Trevor and Vana - just do a show about Kitty learning how to be a sidekick at the academy and getting thrown into bizarre situations as a result. That would've been so much better!