Let's Watch This: "Bugs Bunny's Looney Christmas Tales" (1979)

In the 1970s and 1980s, Warner Bros. churned out a lot of television specials starring the Looney Tunes characters. Most of these were really just compilations of pre-existing shorts with new animation acting as a framing device (for example, 1981's Bugs Bunny: All-American Hero featured shorts like Yankee Doodle Bugs, Bunker Hill Bunny, and Southern Fried Rabbit). In fact, one of them, 1977's Bugs Bunny in Space, didn't feature any new animation at all!

But, some of these specials actually DID consist of completely original animation. The special that we're looking at today, Bugs Bunny's Looney Christmas Tales, is one of them.

This special premiered on CBS on November 27th, 1979. It was directed by Chuck Jones and Friz Freleng. I watched it back in 2016 (I was on a bit of a Looney Tunes kick at the time) and recall finding it okay. Now I'm going to watch it again. Because 'tis the season. Let's get started!

We start off with Bugs (Mel Blanc, of course), Porky Pig (Mel Blanc), Elmer Fudd (guessing Mel Blanc but he doesn't have any solo lines so it's hard to tell), Yosemite Sam (Mel Blanc), Foghorn Leghorn (Mel Blanc), and Pepe Le Pew (Mel Blanc) singing "Deck the Halls". This actually brings up a common complaint I've seen about modern Looney Tunes productions - they portray the characters as buddy buds. People look at productions like Space Jam or the Christmas albums and go "why are they all acting so chummy with each other? Since when are the Looney Tunes friends? Don't most of them try to kill each other?". Well, as this special shows, this isn't entirely new for Looney Tunes. Heck, remember 1956's A Star Is Bored, which portrayed Bugs, Daffy, Sam, and Elmer as Animated Actors? I think it's reasonable to assume that the characters get along fine "off-camera".

Speaking of Daffy, I should probably bring up that he doesn't show up in this special at all. Maybe he flew south for the winter or something? Marvin the Martian doesn't show up either.

Elmer looks high as a kite right now, doesn't he?

After that, we get our first short - a retelling of A Christmas Carol. Sam is Scrooge and Porky is Bob Cratchit... a role he'd also play in 2006's Bah Humduck! A Looney Tunes Christmas (but we'll look at that one another time). Bugs barges in to greet Sam... I mean, Scrooge... eh, what the heck? I'm just calling him Sam... a Merry Christmas, to which Sam goes into a rant about how much he hates Christmas and kicks Bugs out. On the one hand, Bugs did barge in uninvited (Fred at least had the excuse that he was Scrooge's nephew. What's Bugs'?) so I can understand why Sam was annoyed, but Sam didn't have to make such a big deal about it.

So as you might have guessed, Bugs decides he's going to go all "Of course you know this means war" on him. Also, Sylvester (Mel Blanc) is in this short too. He's Sam's cat, but really doesn't have much of a role. In fact, I think he only has one line. Dunno why they even bothered to include him, but I guess they had to find a place for him in the special SOMEWHERE.

Don't you hate it when you come into work and somebody's wearing the
exact same outfit as you?

Bugs' way of getting back at Sam is to... put a piece of coal in the fireplace so Porky is warm, then invite in carolers. That's it? THAT'S how you're gonna put Sam in his place? Come on, you're BUGS BUNNY! Can't you at least stick dynamite down his pants or something?

Sam is so enraged to have carolers in his place of business that not only does he throw them and Bugs out, but he also fires Porky even though Porky had nothing to do with it. Jeez, Sam...

After that, Porky invites Bugs back to his house for Christmas Eve dinner. He's introduced to Mrs. Cratchit, played by Petunia Pig, Tiny Tim, played by Tweety Bird (Mel Blanc), and two kids who don't get names. I'm going to assume that Tweety was adopted since he's the only member of the family that isn't a pig.

There have been shorts where Sylvester was Porky's pet. Why not make him the
Cratchit Family's pet? Or did they just think it'd be disturbing having him try to
eat Tiny Tim?

Some guy shows up at the door with a message from Sam - he's foreclosing the pigs' mortgage and he wants them out of the house by midnight. I bet he also punted puppies into the Grand Canyon and set fire to a building for the heck of it, that Sam. Bugs vows to teach Sam a lesson he'll never forget.

Over at Sam's house, Sam gets in bed, and we discover that he has the ability to talk without moving his mouth. But then, he hears Bugs and the carolers again, and he runs outside to beat them up... only to wind up slipping on the ice and into a snowbank. Again, this seems very tame for Bugs. Then Sam makes himself a hot bath, but Bugs peeks in through the window and fills the bathtub with snow, so when Sam jumps into the bathtub, he gets a nasty surprise. Okay, that's a little better.

So now's when Jacob Marley and the three ghosts show up, right? Well, no. I guess the writers couldn't think of a way to make the past, present, and yet to come stuff funny, so we don't get any of that adapted in this short. I dunno, I think they could've found a way. They could've had Daffy and Marvin be two of the ghosts as a way to work them into the special. The third ghost could've been... I dunno, Pete the Puma? Beaky Buzzard? Gossamer?

But nope, instead we get Bugs dressing up in a sheet and dubbing himself the "Ghost of Christmas".

Wheeeeeeeeeeee...

After some WHACKY SHENANIGANS, Bugs tells Sam that he's going to send him to that dark, fiery place for being such a horrible person. Sam promises to become a better person, puts on a Santa suit, and runs outside to give money to the poor. He also gives Porky his job back offscreen.

The next short stars Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner. We see them lurking outside the pigs' house (which is pretty creepy now that I think about it), then Wile E. chases the Road Runner into the desert... or at least I think it's the desert. I'm pretty sure deserts don't have gigantic snow-capped mountains.

Then again, I've never been to a desert so what do I know?

Wile E. reads in a book about road runners that they hate cold and snow and are easy to catch in snow drifts. So all he has to do is chase him up to one of those snow-capped mountains we saw before and he'll be able to nab him, right?

Oh, who am I kidding? Wile E. will never catch that bird. With his luck it'll probably turn out that the book was written by somebody who knew absolutely nothing about road runners.

And here's another interesting fact about road runners: they're immune to literally
anything that the ACME Company makes. I think one short actually revealed that the
company was owned and operated by the Road Runner.

Instead of, as I suggested, just chasing the Road Runner up to one of those snow-capped mountains, Wile E. decides to buy an ACME snow-making machine. It actually works... but it keeps dumping the snow onto him. After the fourth time, Wile E. goes "to heck with it" and dumps it into a canyon. But it STILL dumps snow on him, and the combined weight causes the cliff he's standing on to fall off and send him into the canyon. It's funnier than I made it sound, trust me.

So THEN Wile E. decides to, y'know, just get the Road Runner up to the snow-capped mountains somehow. But apparently that book was indeed a load of baloney, as the Road Runner can run just fine in the snow. Eventually Wile E. pursues him onto a frozen pond, then dons some skates to create a hole in the ice around the bird. You fool. You never do that in a cartoon. It always just results in all of the ice except that circle you carved with the skates falling into the water and YOU falling in instead of what you're trying to make fall in.

Long story short, road runner stays dry and coyote falls into water. And of course Wile E. still hasn't figured out that he should stop buying his supplies from ACME, because we then see him putting on ACME rocket-powered skis.

Seriously, hasn't Wile E. considered that maybe he should try to buy his supplies
from another company?

After that fails, he buys a dogsled and some sled dogs - only to get mauled by them. According to the shipping label, sled dogs LOVE having coyotes for supper. Considering that coyotes are wild dogs, wouldn't that be considered cannibalism?

I looked it up. Apparently, coyotes can eat dogs. Ignoring that it's still cannibalism, if that's the case why doesn't Wile E. just eat the dogs instead of trying to catch the Road Runner? I mean, other than "because the dogs will maul him before he gets the chance".

Actually, Wile E.'s creator, Chuck Jones, provided an answer for this. He dubbed Wile E. a fanatic, quoting George Santayana's observation that "a fanatic is one who redoubles his effort when he has forgotten his aim". By now, he's just so focused on nabbing the Road Runner that it really doesn't occur to him he can find other ways to get food. There was also a scene in the failed pilot Adventures of the Road Runner where the two boys watching the show ask why Wile E. chases the Road Runner in the first place. Wile E. pauses and explains to them (and us) that road runners are, to coyotes, the tastiest things on the planet - complete with a handy chart.

Okay, now back to the cartoon. Wile E. rides a rocking horse and tries to lasso the Road Runner - doesn't work. Next he tries a giant snowball, but that idea is a bust too. Guess poor Wile E.'s only hope is that Santa brings him some road runner cold cuts for Christmas.

The next segment features Bugs' little nephew, Clyde (June Foray). This actually is not the character's first appearance, as he previously appeared in at least two Bugs Bunny shorts beforehand. However, this special certainly made him a lot cuter.

Cartoon characters in footie pajamas are always cute.

Also appearing in this segment is the Tasmanian Devil (Mel Blanc), who finds himself at the North Pole while the airplane he's in flies over it. He winds up in Santa's suit, then in Santa's sleigh. The very confused and/or frightened reindeer take off.

I mean, there's no way that the reindeer actually looked at this beast and thought,
"Yep, that's definitely Saint Nick"... IS there?

Meanwhile, Bugs is reading his nephew 'Twas the Night Before Christmas. Suddenly, he hears a noise on the roof - it's Taz and the sleigh, and Taz winds up falling down the chimney. It's a little unclear whether or not Bugs actually thinks Taz is Santa or if he's just trolling him (I'm guessing the latter), but either way, he welcomes Taz in and offers him a snack.

If Bugs actually thinks that's Santa, I think he should've put a pair of glasses
on his Christmas list. Aren't carrots supposed to be good for your eyesight?

Oddly, Taz doesn't make the attempt to eat Bugs as he usually does whenever they're in the same cartoon. Instead, he eats a table, a chair, oranges hanging on the tree, some lights, and Clyde's Christmas list. Then he gobbles down a jar full of unpopped corn... right in front of the fireplace. Thankfully, they don't have him blow up like in a certain Larry Doyle-produced short. Then Bugs offers Taz a present, but he has to go outside to open it. I was expecting the present to turn out to be a bomb or something, but instead, it's a self-inflating life raft. Says so on the box. But Taz still eats it, because as we all know he's not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed.

Taz goes into orbit, and Clyde is bummed that Santa didn't leave him any presents in his stocking. Bugs reassures him that when they return his sleigh to him, he'll be so grateful that he'll give Clyde enough presents to put Toys R Us to shame.

"Eat your heart out, Jack Skellington!"

And so the special ends with Bugs and the others doing some more caroling, now aboard a Taz-pulled sleigh... which Taz promptly eats.

What's the Verdict?

I personally liked Bugs Bunny's Looney Christmas Tales as a whole, but it definitely got better after the first segment. The Christmas Carol re-enactment was a big missed opportunity. So much of it is wasted on Bugs giving Sam a hard time, it almost felt like the writers forgot what story they were adapting for a while and then realized, "Oh, crud. We forgot the ghosts." It's also the least funny of the three segments. The Wile E. Coyote / Road Runner and Taz segments fare better. They aren't the funniest Looney Tunes shorts ever made, but they're certainly good for a few chuckles. Also, I wish Daffy at least made a cameo, but that's a small thing.

Next review: Mickey's Once Upon a Christmas (1999)

Let's Watch This: "Rover Dangerfield" (1991)

Well, the holiday season is upon us (I know it's not December yet, but it's after Thanksgiving. I consider that part of the holiday season), so I think now would be a good time to review a movie that takes place around Christmas but isn't entirely about Christmas. That movie is Rover Dangerfield.

Funny thing about this poster... I'm pretty sure that cow, cat, and owl on the poster don't actually appear in the movie. And while there IS a horse in the movie, it doesn't look like the one on the poster.

Rover Dangerfield was released on August 2nd, 1991. Produced by Hyperion Animation (the same guys that brought us The Brave Little Toaster), the film revolves around the fact that its main character is a celebrity except animated as an animal. Y'know, kind of like Bee Movie. Except that instead of Jerry Seinfeld as a bee, the main character is Rodney Dangerfield as a dog. In addition to voicing his cartoon canine counterpart, Rodney also came up with the idea for the film and developed the story with Harold Ramis of Ghostbusters fame.

Now, one important thing to note is that the film was originally conceived as an R-rated comedy that more faithfully captured Rodney's stand-up routines. Then the Warner Bros. executives got their hands on it - if they had to release the film, it had to be a kids' movie because Disney was of course doing great with animated movies for kids in the 1990s and Warner Bros. wanted a slice of that pie (which is also how we got Quest For Camelot). I don't know how the film fared at the box office, but it has a forty-percent rating (in other words, rotten) on Rotten Tomatoes. But, if you go online, you can find a lot of people with fond memories of the film.

So, does Rover Dangerfield deserve the respect that Rover supposedly doesn't get? Or is this movie... if you'll forgive the obvious joke... a dog? Well, if nothing else it can't possibly be any worse than Bee Movie. At least this doesn't have the dog hooking up with a human being. What say we give the film a watch?

The movie begins in the Nevada desert on a dark, moonlit night... just before the camera goes into maximum overdrive and takes us to Las Vegas. Rover's voice goes into a spiel about what a magical place Vegas is. "I tell ya, the action never stops! Tourists come from all over the world! It's wild! It's exciting! People get lucky here! Boy, and what a town to get lucky in!" he exclaims as we're bombarded with neon signs.

It isn't long before we actually get to SEE the Rodney Dangerfield-voiced dog, doing a little gambling with his pooch pals. And making lots of jokes that aren't very funny.

A protagonist in a kids' movie? GAMBLING? Never thought I'd see the day...

After the gambling, Rover and his buddy Eddie (voiced by Ronnie Schell) pay a visit to some showgirl dogs he worked with as a pup. He asks where a dog named "Flappy" is, only to learn that he was fired for not remembering the routine. "Boy, I saw that comin'. Flappy was dumb," Rover says. He was so dumb, according to Rover, that...

- He used to walk backwards and wag his head!

- When Carmine taught him how to sit, he forgot how to stand!

- And when Carmine tried to paper-train him, he went right on the paper... only problem was, Carmine was reading it!

So, yeah. That joke had three punchlines. It's not even, like, mentioning Flappy and how dumb he was is a Running Gag, it's three punchlines right after another. It's like, we get it, Flappy was dumb. What, could the writers just not decide which punchline to use, so they just used all three of them?

Hey, is that music I hear? Methinks Rover is going to sing!

Eddie is basically that guy who thinks hanging out with somebody much cooler
than him and imitating everything that cool guy does will automatically make HIM cool.
Alas, that's not how it works. Sorry, Eddie.

I've admittedly never been to Vegas. Is it really as fun as this film claims it is?

Anyhow, after the song Rover says, "You know how many people work here? One out of four!" Eddie starts laughing hysterically, which he does after almost every joke Rover makes. It's basically clueing the audience in that what Rover's saying is supposed to be funny. Why didn't they just throw in a laugh track while they were at it?

Next, Rover heads backstage to visit his owner, a showgirl named Connie (Shawn Southwick). Unfortunately, Connie has an incredibly sleazy thug of a boyfriend named Rocky (Sal Lindi). Rover has no idea what she sees in him... and, to be honest, so do I.

Later, Rover and Eddie come actross some mobsters meeting up with Rocky and doing some shady activity. One of the mobsters is voiced by the great Bob Bergen. Yes, Porky Pig shares a voice actor with a mobster. I love that we live in a world where I can say that.

"Where's that muh-meh-eeh-muh-meh-money you owe us?"

Eddie winds up accidentally letting go of his bone, which hits the lamp, alerting the mobsters of their presence. Immediately, the mobsters assume that the cops have shown up and that Rocky set them up. Paranoid, aren't they? I mean, if the cops DID show up, wouldn't they have heard sirens or seen headlights or something?

Rocky tells the fleeing mobsters that the source of the bone was a dog, but they don't listen and tell him that he's runnin' out of chances. Once they leave, Rocky attempts to throw the bone at Rover's head, but Rover escapes.

Uncle Jesse really went down a dark path after Full House went off the air.

Rover wakes up the next morning... hung over? Uh, what happened after he and Eddie messed up Rocky's deal with the mobsters? Did he get drunk? Is it even safe for dogs to drink alcohol? Where would a dog even GET alcohol? Are there, I dunno, dog bars in Vegas or something? Y'know what, I'm probably thinking about this too hard...

Connie tells Rover that she's going on the road for two weeks... and for whatever reason she can't take Rover along, so she's asked Rocky to take care of him. He's not too thrilled about this, mainly because he knows that Rocky will use this opportunity to exact his REVENGE.

I like the gag here of Rover taking things out of Connie's suitcase and putting them away.

And exact revenge Rocky does, although he does take his sweet time doing it as opposed to just doing it the second Connie's car drives away. Nope, instead he lets Rover watch some Looney Tunes on TV (synergy!) and then grabs him, stuffs him in a sack, and throws him off the Hoover Dam.

Fortunately, Rover has the benefit of being the main character of a kids' movie, so he's rescued by a couple of fishermen and comes to in the middle of the country.

"Please don't do that 'why the long face' joke. I've heard that one a million times this
week already..."

After some WHACKY SHENANIGANS involving a flock of sheep, he meets another resident of the country - Mr. Combine Harvester.

Could be worse. You're in a cornfield, you could run into the aliens from Signs.

Rover winds up getting sucked up by the combine harvester, but, again, he's the main character of a kids' movie, so he somehow survives. "I'm turnin' into a corndog!" he exclaims after the machine spits him out among the harvested corn.

The driver of the machine, Farmer Cal (Gregg Berger), and his son Danny (Dana Hill), find Rover and start discussing what to do with him. Danny wants to keep him, but Cal suggests taking him to the county shelter... where, if nobody comes to claim him, he'll be put to sleep. Jeez, that's a rather dark thing to bring up in a kids' movie. Not exactly Pound Puppies, is this?

Rover begs Cal to take him in, though that's likely futile since the humans presumably can't hear what the animals are saying (maybe they actually can, I don't know). Eventually, Cal agrees that Danny can keep him... for now. If Rover gets into trouble, he's outta there.

Once he arrives at Cal's farm, the first thing Rover does is wisecrack about the pigs. "Slow down, will ya? You're eatin' like PIGS!" he says. I know The Lion King came out after this, but it did that joke better. Just sayin'. And it for whatever reason takes him this long to realize that he's on a farm. I think the barn should've been enough to give it away, but apparently Rover's a few sodas short of a six-pack.

And now that Rover realizes he's on a farm, it's time for him to make more unfunny jokes. "Hey, you think the rain'll hurt the rhubarb? I think I'll change my name to Jethro! Pay my doctor with a HOG!" he says. Fortunately, another one of Cal's dogs, Raffles (Ned Luke), shows up and saves us from having to listen to more of Rover's stand-up act.

"Could you help me find my way to the set of Babe?"

Rover quickly learns that life on the farm isn't very much like life in Vegas. He's introduced to the farm's other dogs - Max (Bert Kramer), Duke (Robert Pine), Lem (Dennis Blair) and Clem (Don Stewart) - and discovers that for dinner, instead of the scrumptious steaks he was fed in Vegas, he has to eat (GASP!) dog food. "Boy..." he says, "You heard of 'come and get it'? This is 'try and eat it'!"

And the dogs in the country don't gamble. For fun, they howl at the moon. And they all sleep together in one shed. Oh, and did I mention the wolves? There are wolves around, and they've been known to sneak onto the farm. As the other dogs sleep, Rover laments through song that he wants to be back in Vegas... and somehow doesn't wake the other dogs up.

The next morning, Rover is woken up by a rooster named Chester, and when he complains runs afoul of his wife.

"I'll have ya know I'm close friends with Colonel Sanders! I can see to it that ya
wind up on the dinner table!"

WHACKY SHENANIGANS ensure, and then Rover is put to work with Raffles on the sheep-herding. He uses this as an opportunity to channel the drill sergeant in every movie that takes place in the army ever.

"You are not even sheep! You are nothing but unorganized, grabastic pieces of wool!
Because I am hard, you will not like me. But the more you hate me, the more you will learn."

Eventually, Rover spots a girl dog who lives on the farm next door, Daisy (Susan Boyd). He sends Raffles off claiming that he can handle the sheep himself, then ditches the sheep to go flirt with her. At one point during this scene, Rover's eyes randomly point off in different directions, which is a common thing I've noticed in Rodney Dangerfield caricatures. I know we're supposed to find it funny, but to be honest, I find it kind of creepy.

"I can't believe it! I'm losin' to a rug!"

Rover launches into another musical number about how much he loves Daisy... but then remembers that he has, y'know, a JOB to do and rushes back to the sheep. But Farmer Cal's there, too, and he is MAD! You see, while Rover was off wooing a girl dog the sheep... uh... got stuck in a tree?

"Well, you see, we encountered this guy called the Winter Warlock while Rover was away, and
he gave us this magic corn..."

Cal makes Rover sleep in the cellar until he stops being such a failure at being a farm dog. Daisy stops by to talk to him, pointing out to him that life isn't just a stand-up comedy act. "Maybe if you pitch in and stop looking for an angle, you might just get to LIKE farm life," she says.

I see the animators wanted to do something interesting with the lighting.

After letting Rover out, Daisy takes him to just look at the starry night sky. Methinks they're going to feel the love tonight.

And no, that wasn't an innuendo. Get your minds out of the gutter, guys.

The next morning, Rover becomes depressed after he hears Cal badmouthing him. He starts lamenting that he can't do anything right and that he doesn't belong on the farm... isn't it a bit too early for Rover to go all "I'm a complete loser and I should leave"? We're only thirty-eight minutes in. Well, anyway, he wanders around moping about what a screw-up he supposedly is, but then Daisy gives him a pep talk and he decides not to leave. Sooooooooooo... yeah, that was totally necessary, right?

Why the girl dog wearing eyeshadow? I mean, aside from "so we can tell it's a girl"...

So we get a montage of Rover helping out around the farm. He herds sheep, plays fetch, watches the snow fall, cracks jokes about a snooty British-accented turkey voiced by Tress MacNeille, all the things a dog can do on a farm, he does.

I don't know why, but I find Tress MacNeille's performance as the turkey hilarious.

Once the holiday season comes around, it's time to go searching for a Christmas tree. And if you're at all familiar with this film, you should know what THAT means!

Okay, for those who haven't ever looked up the film online, it means that Rover is going to sing "I'll Never Do it on a Christmas Tree". Yes, the film has a song about how this dog isn't going to do his business on a Christmas tree. "Let It Go" can suck it - THIS is the best song to ever come out of an animated movie!

I'm just joking, of course. This song's catchy, but it's certainly not the BEST song to ever come out of an animated movie. "Hakuna Matata" exists, after all.

He's having way too much fun singing this, by the way.

That night, Rover spots a pack of wolves (Chris Latta, Danny Mann, and Bernard Erhard) sneaking onto the barnyard. They're hoping to have a turkey dinner. Where's a Sam Elliot-voiced cow with a guitar when you need him?

I know... out of context, it kind of looks like the wolves are staring at Rover's butt.

Rover tries to stop them, but because it's three wolves against one clearly out of shape dog, he doesn't have much luck. Fortunately, Farmer Cal comes a-rushin' out of the house with a gun, spooking the wolves and causing them to scamper. "Whoo! Heh... I'm glad WE'RE okay!" Rover says... just before realizing that the turkey died anyway. D'oh. And just to add insult to injury, then Cal shows up, sees Rover with the corpse, and assumes that Rover killed the turkey despite Rover's best efforts to convince him otherwise. Is it bad that I find this scene funny, if only in a "this really should not be as funny as it is" kind of way?

Boy, this movie took a dark turn all of a sudden...

Cal decides that he's going to give Rover the Old Yeller treatment. He takes him out into the woods, ties him to a tree, and picks up his gun. "This is hard for me, Rover," he says, "But you've taken a life. I'm sorry." But just when it seems like he's about to reconsider, in come the wolves.

Wouldn't a wolf eating a dog qualify as cannibalism?

Rover manages to save Cal and defeat the wolves, all the while making a bunch of unfunny jokes comparing the wolves to the one in the fairy tales. Y'know, "That was for the Three Little Pigs!" and "I know what YOU'RE thinkin' - you'd rather be at GRANDMA'S house!" and "Who do you think you're dealin' with, Little Red Riding Hood?" Get it? It's funny because they're wolves. Why stop there? Why don't you throw in a reference to Peter and the Wolf while you're at it?

Unfortunately, Cal is unconscious, so Rover gets the other dogs and enlists their help in getting Cal home. Rover's a hero! He even gets his picture in the newspaper, which Eddie shows Connie, clueing her in as to where he is. So she drives out to the country to pick him up... just as Rover is serenading Daisy with another love song. Bad timing rears its ugly head once again.

Soon Rover is back in Vegas, telling unfunny jokes to his pals and having a great time. But then guess who decides to show up?

Never trust people who have hair like that. Just a word of advice.

Rover attacks Rocky in retaliation for, y'know, the Hoover Dam thing, and he winds up accidentally revealing to Connie that he tried to murder her dog. She responds by punching him in the face. Dang, wasn't expecting THAT!

Realizing that his goose has been cooked, Rocky runs off with the dogs in hot pursuit. But then he spots his little mobster buddies in a limo and ducks inside. Oh, goody, are we going to get a battle between dogs and mobsters?

Well, no. But don't worry, Rocky's gonna get his comeuppance.

"You suh-seh-eeh-suh-seh-still owe us that muh-meh-eh-muh-meh-money, Rocky."

"Wanna see the Hoover Dam?" one of the mobsters asks a horrified Rocky before the limo drives off. So, yeah. Rocky's gonna get murdered. Dark? Yes, but I ain't gonna say he didn't deserve it.

So, predictably, Rover still misses Daisy and the farm. Fortunately, Connie understands and drives him back to the farm and lets Cal take him in. But Daisy's still upset at him for leaving, but a reprise of that love song is enough to have her forgive him. It's a good thing, too - because apparently, Rover and Daisy got BIIIIIIIIIIIIZ-ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Were the little Rover puppies all born with the ties, or did Cal have to go out and buy them?
And if it's the latter, what store sells puppy-sized ties?

What's the Verdict?

My expectations going into Rover Dangerfield were admittedly pretty weak, but the movie is actually better than I thought it would be. Nice animation, likeable characters, some catchy songs, and while Rover's constant one-liners can get annoying, every so often I do get a chuckle out of the film. The funniest thing about the film is that Lem and Clem have cultured British accents that you wouldn't expect a farm hound to have. It's a great film to show your kids if you want to get them into Rodney Dangerfield.

Still, I'm glad this didn't lead to MORE animated movies where the whole joke is that it's some random celebrity as an animal. We'd have to wait until 2004 to get another movie like that.

P.S. How DID the sheep get stuck in the tree? I mean, aside from "it's funny"...

Let's Watch This: An Episode of "TUFF Puppy"

The Fairly OddParents' premiere in 2001 was the start of Nickelodeon's relationship with Butch Hartman. That show, of course, became one of Nickelodeon's most popular, so it's not surprising that the higher-ups at the channel would want Mr. Hartman to create for them MORE shows. So in 2004, they premiered another show from Butch (and perhaps his most beloved), Danny Phantom... but we'll look at that show another time.

In 2010, Butch's THIRD show for Nickelodeon premiered. This one was pitched to them as basically being Get Smart with a dog.

TUFF Puppy's first episode aired on October 2nd, 2010. The show focuses on a dog named Dudley Puppy, voiced by Jerry Trainor (likely only cast because iCarly was popular at the time and also aired on Nickelodeon. Y'know, synergy). Dudley's shtick as a character is that he's an idiot. Like, the 2007 version of George of the Jungle levels of idiot. He's such an idiot, he doesn't even know what a toaster does. In the first episode, he manages to get a job as a spy for an organization called T.U.F.F. (which stands for Turbo Undercover Fighting Force) despite the fact that he's, as we've established, an idiot. His partner is a cat named Kitty Kattswell (voiced by Grey DeLisle-Griffin), who predictably is much smarter than Dudley and is often enraged by his stupidity. Their boss is a flea named Chief Herbert Dumbrowski (voiced by Daran Norris) and another member of T.U.F.F. is a scientist named Keswick (voiced by Jeff Bennett) whose shtick is that nobody knows what kind of animal he is, until one episode where it's creatively (I say that sarcastically) revealed that his species is a "Keswick". They fight the schemes of the evil rat Verminous Snaptrap (voiced by Maddie Taylor)... why are rats in cartoons almost always bad guys? That's unfair towards rats.

Now, one thing to keep in mind is that this show is one of Nick's 2010s cartoons. This was the decade when their new shows were reaaaaaaaaaaally hit-or-miss. Remember Sanjay and Craig? That was from the 2010s and it was pretty lame. Pig Goat Banana Cricket? That was a 2010s Nicktoon. And who could forget the piece of crap that was Planet Sheen? So I think you can see why I'm hesitant about this being a good show. Also, Butch Hartman has become a bit controversial in recent years, for reasons I'd rather not get into. But hey, there are a lot of people that really like it, so I suppose there's a chance it'll be good.

This is one of those "two segments per episode" shows, so we'll be watching the episodes "Big Dog on Campus" and "Dog's Best Friend". This is TUFF Puppy.

I know the quality of the screencaps is really bad. Please just bear with me.

The episode begins with Dudley barging into T.U.F.F. and announcing that he's been invited to his high school reunion. "FINALLY! NOW I GET TO SHOW ALL MY CLASSMATES THAT I'M A TOTALLY COOL SECRET AGENT!" he shouts. Believe it or not, in high school everyone thought Dudley was a loser. In fact, he was voted "most likely to be an assistant to a rodeo clown".

Just then, they get intel that someone is planning on destroying the reunion. Alas, it doesn't say who. "Darn. If it said who, we could just arrest the guy and then go shoe-shopping!" the Chief complains.

From left to right - Loud Idiot, Jerry Lewis Parody and Furry Bait.

So the Chief tells Dudley and Kitty to attend the reunion and thwart the crime. Y'know, it's shown that T.U.F.F. has an incredibly large amount of agents. So with that in mind, why does the Chief always turn to Dudley and Kitty? I mean, aside from "well, they're the main characters".

In addition, Dudley and Kitty will have to be in disguise so as to not tip off the bad guy. Dudley will be going as an assistant to an apprentice rodeo clown... you know, the exact same thing that he was voted most likely to be in high school. Just a coincidence, or does Keswick have a twisted sense of humor? You be the judge.

I'm not lovin' it (ba-da-ba-ba-baaaaaaa). And judging from his expression, neither is Dudley.

And Kitty will be going as "Lulu Stepanski"... who was the prettiest girl in high school, but is now bald. Isn't having Kitty pretend to be someone who actually went to that high school a bad idea? What if the actual Lulu Stepanski shows up? Or is it that there waws never an actual Lulu Stepanski, in which case everyone else at the reunion will be suspicious because they don't remember going to high school with a cat named Lulu?

To further rub salt on the "Dudley is a massive loser" thing, all of his classmates turn out to be the coolest thing since sliced bread. One of them even wound up becoming President of the Entire Universe. The popular kids pelt eggs and chickens at Dudley... as I said in my review of Rocket Monkeys, chickens aren't automatically funny. It also raises the question of why there are non-anthropomorphic chickens in a world populated by anthropomorphic animals.

Then again, if chickens weren't non-anthropomorphic in this world, where would they
be getting the eggs from?

Dudley wants to tell them that he's a super-cool secret agent, but Kitty tells him A) that would be blowing his cover and B) it doesn't matter what the others think of him so long as he has self-confidence or whatever.

Then Dudley notices the school bully, Spike, and assumes that he's the one planning to destroy the reunion. After all, he WAS voted "most likely to destroy the class reunion" in the yearbook. But then the actual bad guy crushes Spike with a disco ball. So, that theory is out the window. Oh, and we also get some unfunny jokes that seem to subscribe to the theory that characters screaming is automatically funny as well. For example, Dudley grabs a bratwurst from the refreshments table and starts shouting about how much he loves bratwurst. "They should be called BratBEST! Or BESTwurst!" And then he starts eating it, and he gets some sauce on Kitty, making her shout that the hot sauce is somehow hurting her skin (isn't she technically covered with fur?). Are you laughing yet? Well, neither am I.

Dudley spots another suspicious-looking character, Ron Suspect (his sister's name is Ima Suspect. The police were always at their house). When they start talking to him, he casually admits that he'd love to demolish the school building so he can put up a mall on the land it sits on, then proceeds to let out an evil laugh. "Well, it's not him, Kitty. Moving on!" Dudley yells, because as we've established Dudley is a few sodas short of a six-pack.

That giraffe is creeping me out...

The class lines up to take a photo, and the hippo taking it doesn't notice that the camera is in fact a bomb despite the multiple stacks of TNT attatched to the wire. Because apparently everyone in this world is as stupid as Dudley. But the bomb doesn't actually kill anyone, so...

Blah-blah-blah, stuff happens and then it's revealed that the evil villain planning to destroy the reunion and everyone that attended it is the lunch lady... oh, I mean, the lunch ladybug. It's a pun.

What a twist!

Apparently, the lunch ladybug was angry that nobody liked her cooking, so she's decided to trap the classmates in a giant colander and drown them all in gravy. Dudley and Kitty reveal that they're secret agents and prevent the gravy from drowning the other students with... get ready for this... a giant wall of mashed potatoes. Dang it, now I'm craving mashed potatoes. And it's only 8:44 in the morning as I'm writing this. Why am I craving mashed potatoes at 8:44 in the morning?

Dudley defeats the lunch ladybug by shooting a roast turkey at her... which brings us back to the "there are non-anthropomorphic animals in a world full of anthropomorphic animals?" thing. At least, I'm ASSUMING that the turkey was non-anthropomorphic. It'd be incredibly dark to have a bunch of anthropomorphic animals murder and cook an anthropomorphic turkey. Also, I'd like to say that all this gravy, mashed potatoes, and turkey is the reason I posted this review during the same week as Thanksgiving, but it's just a coincidence. I'm not nearly that clever.

So everyone thinks that Dudley is awesome, and he gives a speech about how it's not on the outside that counts, but who you are on the INSIDE. And on the inside, he's really craving some mashed potatoes, so he goes over to the mashed potato wall and digs a spoon into it... unleashing all the gravy that it was holding back. Nyuck nyuck nyuck.

The screen goes black... and then Dudley loudly shouts that he has to go to the bathroom, followed by Keswick popping up and realizing that he could've just given them astronaut costumes. We're supposed to assume that Keswick was just being absent-minded, but I dunno, I think he knew what he was doing.

"Ain't I a stinker?"

Okay, next episode...

"Dog's Best Friend" begins with Dudley getting into some WHACKY SHENANIGANS involving traffic, then the camera travels into the sewers so we can be introduced to Verminous Snaptrap and his henchmen. And then Snaptrap starts talking. No disrespect towards Maddie Taylor, but why did the showrunners choose to give Snaptrap a voice that sounds like Yakkity Yak? THAT'S supposed to be a voice we can take seriously coming out of a villain? Even a comedic one?

That purse isn't made of alligator skin, is it? I think that'd be pretty awkward.

Anyhow, let me talk about Snaptrap's henchmen. They consist of a wimpy little shrew named Larry (also voiced by Jeff Bennett), a British opossum who looks nothing like an opossum named Ollie (Jeff Bennett), and a Wally Gator parody named Francisco (Daran Norris). They start talking about how much they suck at being villains. But Snaptrap has a way of getting around that - he bought a super-powerful killer robot! And it looks like this:

Yeah, it's basically just WALL-E but tweaked a little so Nickelodeon won't have to worry about PIXAR's lawyers coming their way.

The robot is about as threatening as a Care Bear eating jelly beans on a sunny day, but fortunately the remote control has a "killer" setting, which turns it into an obviously CGI killing machine. Seeing CGI in Butch Hartman's shows has always felt so weird to me. Like, it's so glaringly out-of-place with this art style.

And because Snaptrap is an idiot, it doesn't occur to him that he can use this robot to destroy T.U.F.F. until Ollie and Larry suggest it. Speaking of which, how are the T.U.F.F. agents doing?

Nice secret headquarters, guys. I'm sure the bad guys will never be able to figure out
that the building with "TUFF" written on the side in humongous letters is where they
can find the agents that keep stopping their plans and destroy them when they least expect
it. Then again, Snaptrap is a moron so there's a pretty good chance he wouldn't think of that.

Snaptrap calls up T.U.F.F. and brags to them about how he's got a big scary weapon that he can use to destroy them. But before they can go beat the crap out of him, Kitty asks the Chief if they can wait for Dudley... who's still getting into WHACKY SHENANIGANS with the traffic.

Meanwhile, Snaptrap is getting into some WHACKY SHENANIGANS of his own. He didn't bother to read the robot's manual, so he randomly starts pressing buttons on the remote control and gets the robot acting up. It starts destroying his lair, launching bees and hot sauce everywhere, and Snaptrap is so enraged that he dubs the robot useless. It sadly leaves.

And who does the robot run into after that? Why, Dudley, of course!

"Holy crap, it's WALL-E! My favorite PIXAR character!"

Dudley and the robot immediately become best buddies, and we get a montage of them doing stuff like going fishing and playing frisbee. Then he introduces the robot to his fellow T.U.F.F. agents, who allow the robot to push the big red button signaling their being on a "red alert". Then we get the exact same joke being told thrice... someone with something for one of the T.U.F.F. agents (a guy with a huge check who tells Keswick that he's won a million dollars, a hunky cat who Kitty has the hots for, the Chief's brother) walks in and the characters assume he's an intruder and zap them with laser guns.

Back to Snaptrap and his gang. They finally find the robot's remote, and it shows them that he's inside T.U.F.F. Ollie has to point out to him that he can now destroy the T.U.F.F. agents, because, again, Snaptrap is just as much of an idiot as Dudley.

Meanwhile, at T.U.F.F., this is going on.

Snaptrap presses the button on the remote that causes the robot to go from a WALL-E knockoff to a killer robot with lots and lots of weapons. Fortunately, Dudley reminds him of the good times they had and how they're best buddies, resulting in the robot doing a Heel-Face Turn. They arrest Snaptrap and his minions, have tacos (great, now I'm craving tacos), and the robot is a member of T.U.F.F. now. I dunno if he shows up in any episodes after this, though.

"NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES!"
(Yes, I'm pretty sure that mass of what looks like Cheetos dust is intended
to be a swarm of bees. But with this lousy quality, it's hard to tell)

What's the Verdict?

TUFF Puppy is another show that I'm going to have to put in the "okay" category. Honestly, I expected it to be really bad. And it does have its problems... which I think mainly stem from our lead characters. Dudley and Kitty are not very interesting characters. I've seen cartoon characters whose main shtick is that they're idiots done much better outside of this show (off the top of my head, there's Patrick Star, Phillip J. Fry, Homer Simpson, Bullwinkle...). Kitty, meanwhile, is just there to be the competent one, I don't think she demonstrated one other personality trait in either episode other than "she's much more competent than Dudley". As a result, Grey DeLisle-Griffin's talents are kind of wasted as her (on the bright side, you could always close your eyes and imagine Daphne Blake saying Kitty's lines). Speaking of the voice acting, I remember liking Jerry Trainor as Spencer from iCarly, but he really does not bring anything to Dudley that a professional voice actor couldn't have. Maybe if he hadn't been directed to shout every single line of dialogue that he was given, he could've done better. Snaptrap is obnoxious and one of the worst "comedic villains" in a cartoon that I've ever seen. I think even Dr. Doofenschmirtz would be slapping his forehead at how pathetic he is. I kind of liked Keswick. Too bad he didn't have more screentime in this episode.

Problem number two is that the show isn't very funny. Most of the jokes rely on the fact that characters are shouting. And like I said, shouting all the time is not automatically funny (if it were, then Mr. Enter would be a laugh riot). So, yeah, it's definitely not one of Nickelodeon's best cartoons but it's certainly not one of their worst either. I think it's actually a guilty pleasure of sorts for me.

Oh, and since Thanksgiving is this week, my next review will be Christmas-related. Until then, Happy Thanksgiving!