Did You Know? - Fun Facts About "Hercules"

Welcome to another edition of a series that I like to call Did You Know?. Inspired a little by the Nostalgia Critic's "What You Never Knew" series, this series will allow me to share with you some interesting tidbits, behind-the-scenes information, and fun facts about an animated movie or TV series. Because I like sharing new information with people.

So, Hercules. I've talked about the film before on my blog - well, specifically, I've looked at the spin-off TV series that it spawned. At the beginning of that post, I talked a little about the film's being a black sheep of sorts for Disney. I think it mainly stems from the fact that saying it's accurate to the Greek myths is like saying that pigs have the ability of flight. Regardless, there are a lot of people - myself included - that actually like the movie.

I've already told you about the cancelled direct-to-video sequel, Hercules II: The Trojan War. You probably don't need to be reminded that Scar from The Lion King makes a cameo. And if you didn't pick up that "Air Herc" campaign is a reference to Nike's "Air Jordan" campaign, I'm guessing you were living under a rock for most of the 1990s (or maybe you just weren't born yet when the "Air Jordan" campaign was popular, like me). But did you know any of THIS?

Concept art for Hercules and the Hydra.

1) Animator Joe Haidar is the one who came up with doing Hercules as a Disney movie. After pitching the idea, he hoped that he would get a supervising position on the film. He did not - in fact, he didn't work on the film at all.

2) When Gerald Scarfe was brought on as the film's production designer, Disney was apparently frightened of him at first. "Partly because of my drawings, and partly because they thought I was going to be cross with them for not being able to draw like me," he said in an interview. "But I felt these people were the top of their world and they might just say 'Shove off. Who are you?' to me."

Gerald initially considered basing the main character on a young Paul Newman or Elvis Presley. Yep, Elvis Presley as Hercules. What a mental image THAT is...

Concept art for Hercules and Philoctetes.

3) Andreas Deja, Hercules' supervising animator, said in regards to Gerald Scarfe's work on the film, "When I first came on the movie, Gerald had done a few drawings and I thought, 'my God, this stuff is wonderful and wild but how am I going to animate it?' 'Where are the joints and how can you make this stuff move in a believable way?' But you just roll up your sleeves and try it. Then you find a middle ground where you have your Disney experience and you take on this new look and it becomes a fun mix. Gerald was a joy to work with because he loved what we did. He had also done some animation in the past so he knew the problems that we were up against."

4) The film's directors, John Musker and Ron Clements, make a cameo during the scene where Hercules is pulling the hay wagon into the marketplace.

This is them.

5) Ron and John's pal Howard Ashman was an inspiration on the decision to have gospel music. John explained on a now-deleted Howard Ashman tribute website that when trying to figure what musical approach would work for the story, he thought back to how, whenever they visited New York, they would always ask Howard what show he recommended seeing. On a 1988 trip, Howard suggested they see Gospel of Colonus, saying that it was the best thing on Broadway at the time.

For those unaware, Gospel of Colonus was a show created by Lee Breuer and composer Bob Telson, a take on Sophocles' Greek tragedy Oedipus at Colonus (the very same Oedipus who gets a reference in Hercules - Hercules mentions that he and Meg went to see a play about him). The play had a black Pentecostal preacher and his choir tell the story of Oedipus. John never wound up seeing the play (although years later he did see a production in Los Angeles), but he did check out the cast album while Hercules was in development. According to John, "It seemed to suggest a way to approach the music in our movie. It seemed appropriate to have a Greek chorus tell us the story, this being, after all, the story of a Greek demigod. And who better than the Muses, the goddesses who inspired art, literature, and science to be this Greek chorus? And since our chorus was to sing about the exploits of ‘the gods’, having them sing gospel, a style of music that celebrates ‘God,’ seemed appropriate.  It was a short step from there to seeing them as an all girl group like the Supremes, and have them musically bridge scenes, do exposition, comment on action, and celebrate the exploits of our mythic hero."

When they pitched the idea to Alan Menken, he was concerned that the Muses might come off as a bit too similar to Crystal, Ronette and Chiffon from Little Shop of Horrors (which, of course, Howard also had a hand in). He suggested doing Hercules in a more "classical" style a la Candide, but Ron and John were worried that the material would become "stiff and inaccessible" as past handling of Greek mythology in film had been. They felt a gospel approach to the music would make the movie more fun. Alan eventually relented.

Concept art for Megara.

6) Donny Osmond was considered to do Hercules' singing voice, but after his audition they decided that he wasn't quite right for the character.

7) In fact, a LOT of different people auditioned or were considered to voice characters. Brendan Fraser auditioned to voice Hercules. Anne Heche auditioned for Meg. Rod Steiger auditioned for Zeus. Richard Lewis was Ron and John's first choice for Panic.

Danny DeVito was the filmmakers' first choice for Philoctetes, but he wouldn't read for the part. Ed Asner, Ernest Borgnine, Dick Latessa, and Red Buttons all auditioned (as he was leaving, Red guessed that Ron and John would eventually give the part to Danny DeVito). Ultimately, Danny agreed to do Phil - he didn't read for it but was interested.

More concept art for Hercules and Phil.

As for Hades, they initially wanted Jack Nicholson to do his voice (he also offered to voice Phil), but he turned it down because he wanted Disney to give him participation in the merchandising, which they were unwilling to do. Michael Ironside, Terrence Mann, Ron Silver, James Coburn, Ron Steiger, Kevin Spacey, Martin Landau, William Shatner and Phil Hartman all tried out for the role. Nik Ranieri, the character's supervising animator, suggested Frank Sinatra. Even Jerry Lewis was considered. At some point John saw Robert Evans, the producer of Love Story and Chinatown, being interviewed by Charlie Rose and started thinking about casting him as Hades. When he suggested the idea to Michael Eisner, he replied, "Evans?! He would be great! He IS the devil! Well, actually, David Geffen is the devil, but Robert Evans is right behind him!" So Ron and John met with Robert, who was interested in the part and wanted to base his performance off of mobster Lucky Luciano, with whom he'd had experiences that were "laden with threat and fear". He came into the studio to record dialogue, but it soon became apparent that Robert wasn't much of an actor. As John put it, "He gave it a Herculean effort, but in truth, Robert Evans plays pretty much one character and it’s one that he invented and for which he writes all the lines: Robert Evans."

More auditions were held, and James Woods was among those who auditioned, playing Hades as... well, the character we got in the finished movie. John Lithgow was cast, but they didn't feel he was bringing enough energy to the character. Eventually, they decided on James Woods.

Concept art for Hades (and Pain).

Even Thalia, the muse of comedy, was originally going to be voiced by Nell Carter. John explained, "We generally are reluctant to cast people who don’t come in to read. We like to hear what people will do with the material, something not always possible to anticipate based on past performances.  We loved Nell’s singing in Ain’t Misbehavin' and her TV work was very funny. And she wouldn’t audition." Regardless, they cast her, and when she came in for the first recording session, trouble began immediately. "She did not take well to direction. If we suggested ‘faster’ she went slower. If we said ‘bigger’ she got smaller.  She seemed very defensive, out of sorts, and ironically (there’s that word again) for a woman playing the bubbly muse of comedy, unfunny.  She was concerned that we were saying unkind things about her in the booth. In truth we were thinking them, although we really were scrambling, trying to find some way to unlock her 'funny'." After recasting the character, they found out that Nell had reportedly declared bankruptcy that week, and also struggled with substance issues. Make of that what you will...

8) The Fates tell Hades that "in eighteen years precisely, the planets will align ever-so-nicely" and we see the planets aligning... but there are only six of them. This is because the Greeks were only aware of five planets plus Earth which they could see with the naked eye.

Concept art of the Muses.

9) According to Nik Ranieri, Eric Goldberg was originally supposed to animate Hades and Chris Buck was supposed to animate Phil. Then Eric decided he didn't want to animate Hades, and Chris Buck left Disney. So Eric jumped at the chance to be Phil's supervising animator, and Nik was asked to do Hades.

10) When Hermes presents Zeus and Hera with a bouquet of flowers, it's a reference to the logo of FTD Florists, which features Hermes - or, as he's called in Greek, Mercury.

11) Charlton Heston provided the film's opening narration. When the filmmakers asked if he was okay with the lines as written, he said that he had an issue with one - specifically, "You go, girls." He thought they had the grammar wrong for that line and suggested that it instead be "Go ahead, young lady." The filmmakers just thought there was comedy to be had from hearing somebody who played Moses say "You go, girls."

12) Pegasus uses his feathers to emulate a peacock when Zeus says that he has the brain of a bird. In Greek mythology, the peacock was a sacred animal to Hera.

13) When Pain and Panic are feeding baby Herc the potion that'll turn him mortal, Pain says, "Here you go, kid. A little Grecian formula." For those unaware, Grecian formula is a real life hair product that's used to color grey hair.

Concept art of Pain and Panic.

14) In the original myths, Pain and Panic actually worked for Ares, the God of War, not Hades. He had four servants - Pain, Panic, Famine and Oblivion (which John Musker once quipped "sounds like a terrible law firm"). The filmmakers decided to use Pain and Panic in the movie because they thought they sounded like the perfect names for Hades' sidekicks.

15) When Hades says "Guys, relax. It's only half-time.", he's not just referring to how Hercules hasn't taken out the Hydra yet - he says it exactly at the 46-minute mark, the halfway point of the 92-minute long movie. And by the way, since this article has thirty-one facts about the movie in it, by being in the fifteenth spot this fact is at (more or less) the halfway point in the article. Aren't I clever?

16) Y'know that gag in "Zero to Hero" where Hercules and Pegasus fly by a constellation of Marilyn Monroe? Well, originally, the scene had constellations of Ariel and Sebastian from The Little Mermaid, but it was removed because it distracted test audiences (they were too busy going "Hey, that's Ariel and Sebastian!" to pay attention to the rest of the song).

More concept art.

17) When the two boys (who, spoiler alert, are actually Pain and Panic in disguise) are trapped under the rock, one of them yells, "Somebody call IXII!". "IX-I-I" is "911" in Roman numerals.

18) At one point during the song "I Won't Say I'm in Love", there's a reference to the iconic Disney Parks attraction the Haunted Mansion. Specifically, at one point the Muses turn into the singing busts from the ride:

Which one's Thurl Ravenscroft?

19) Two prior Disney characters inspired Eric Goldberg's design for Phil. Those two characters were Grumpy from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and Bacchus from Fantasia. Danny DeVito himself also inspired the character's look (a lot of people have joked that he looks like Eric Goldberg, too).

20) Hercules and Pegasus leaving their handprints (well, HOOFprints in Pegasus' case) in concrete is an obvious reference to Grauman's Chinese Theater, but notice that Hercules adds the words "To Sid" to his handprints. This is a reference to Sid Grauman, the founder of the Chinese Theater.

Does this mean that Sid Grauman was around in Ancient Greece?

21) Hercules' "Grecian Express" credit card featured during the "Zero to Hero" segment is an obvious parody of American Express. Don't leave Thebes without it!

No wonder Doug Walker doesn't like the movie - this gag probably gave him
flashbacks to the "Bat Credit Card".

22) When Hades and Hercules make their deal (that Herc has to give up his strength for twenty-four hours so Hades can unleash the Titans and take over Mount Olympus, but if Meg gets hurt Herc gets his strength back), Hades shakes Hercules' hand with his left. Left handedness is associated with being evil - apologies to all you lefties out there - and shaking with your left hand is seen as rude.

23) It took a while for the filmmakers to figure out what Hades' punishment should be. Barry Johnson posted some gag drawings depicting ideas that were considered on Instagram - Hades being reduced to a used chariot salesman or the Underworld ferryman, becoming the janitor at the museum we see at the start of the movie, and getting locked in the Titans' pit with Pain and Panic. Eventually, they settled on having Hercules punch Hades into the River Styx, where he is attacked by the vengeful souls.

24) Some of the twelve labors from the original myth are included in the film - specifically, during the song "Zero to Hero", Hercules has to fight an Erymanthian boar, a Stymphalian bird, and a Nemean lion (who may or may not be Scar from The Lion King), which he also did as part of the twelve labors.

25) Speaking of the myth, at one point Hera (who in the original myth was the villain) sent down two snakes to kill Hercules, only for him to beat them up. Pain and Panic's shapeshifting into snakes is a reference to that.

A t-shirt presumably once worn by someone who attended the world premiere
of the film in New York.

26) The shooting star that Hercules sees at one point during "Go the Distance"? Some have theorized that it's Aladdin and Jasmine flying over Greece on their magic carpet ride. But according to Ron Clements and John Musker, the star is actually Pegasus watching over Herc (Hercules did meet Aladdin in an episode of his TV series, for what it's worth).

27) One of the most frequent criticisms Hercules receives is that it's really, really inaccurate to the myths. Ron Clements defended this in the film's press kit - "We discovered that there wasn't just one definitive version of the Hercules legend, but many, many different stories. He became such an incredibly popular hero that, in fact, a lot of other stories about other heroes got turned into Hercules stories. He was so popular that they took the earlier myths and reinvented them."

Do you remember the tie-in plates from McDonald's? Question - could you eat
off these? Were they microwave-safe?

28) I had to share this tidbit from Nik Ranieri... Hades was inspired, at least in his mannerisms and dialogue, by Jeffrey Katzenberg, who left Disney before the film's release (reasons include his completely ignoring Robin Williams' wishes while promoting Aladdin and his meddling with the production of Toy Story [he's the guy responsible for the infamous "Black Friday" reel]). As you probably know, Jeffrey helped found DreamWorks.

At a recording session for the scene near the end of the film where Hades is begging Hercules to put in a good word for him to Zeus (just before Hercules punches him into the River Styx, as mentioned above), Nik suggested that James Woods ad-lib the line, "This was my destiny, I had a DREAM in the WORKS." Get it?

James recorded it (then added "I'm sorry Jeffrey, they made me say it..."), and Nik begged Ron and John to include the line in the movie just for the upcoming screening of it that Michael Eisner was going to watch, but alas, they were too afraid to do it.

29) Here's another interesting story from Nik - during early publicity for another Disney film, 2008's Bolt, Nik noticed that the teaser poster - this one here...

...looked a lot like the teaser poster for Hercules.

When no one was looking, Nik put up the Hercules poster right next to the Bolt poster that was hanging up in the studio foyer. Within a couple of hours, it was taken down.

30) In the 2000s, you could find a stage adaptation of the movie on two of the Disney Cruise ships (the Disney Magic and the Disney Wonder, specifically). It was called Hercules: The Muse-ical. You can find videos of the show on YouTube, it really must be seen to be believed.

31) Finally, we have to talk about just how much promotion there was for the film. First of all, they had something called a "Hercules Mega Mall Tour", which was described online as a "20-city traveling show" featuring a stage show, a miniature carousel, a carnival, an animation workshop where visitors could learn how to draw Hercules, and even a sneak peek at the film. I don't think even Frozen was promoted with a gigantic touring mini-amusement park.

This ALSO got a t-shirt.

In addition, to celebrate the film's premiere Disney sent their beloved Main Street Electrical Parade to New York City - with several new Hercules-themed floats among the usual ones - for a special one-night-only performance.

And then there was the weekend upon which the actual premiere, also held in New York City, took place. Aside from the parade there were also dancers, jugglers, and something called the "Hercules Forum of Fun" at Chelsea Piers. Then the next morning there was a stage show called "The Hercules Summer Spectacular" at the New Amsterdam Theatre.

Not bad for a movie that Disney rarely acknowledges nowadays, huh?

Sources:
- http://web.archive.org/web/20131219065443/http://howardashman.com/blog/john-musker-question-countdown-3/
- Nik Ranieri's FaceBook page

Let's Watch This - An Episode of "Super Duper Sumos"

NOTE: Please do not take any of the little nitpicks in this review (or any of my other reviews, for that matter) seriously. I write these reviews in the hopes of making people laugh. Those nitpicks are really just dumb little observations that I'm attempting to make jokes out of, not complaints that add to whether or not I like something.

NOTE #2: No disrespect is meant towards anyone who worked on the show I am reviewing today. I'm sure they are all very nice and talented people.

NOTE #3: If you like this show, that is great. Go ahead and like it. I'm not judging you.

I've never really understood why sumo wrestling is so popular. I don't know, watching fat nearly naked people beat each other up doesn't sound like my idea of a fun spectator sport. But in Japan, it's a national pastime, and to cartoons, it's comedy gold. After all, it involves two things - fat people and naked people - that everyone thinks are much funnier than they actually are. So if it's animated and it takes place in Japan, expect a sumo wrestler to pop up at some point. Even an advertisement for Ritz crackers got in on the act:

At some point, the folks at DiC Entertainment (same guys responsible for The Super Mario Bros. Super Show) got an idea: what if they did a cartoon starring sumo wrestlers? So they teamed up with South Korea firm Ameko Entertainment to produce three animated shows, the first one being Super Duper Sumos.

And thus, September 22nd, 2001 saw the premiere of Super Duper Sumos on Nickelodeon in the United States and on a channel called Tooniverse in South Korea. One season, consisting of twenty-six episodes, was produced, chronicling the adventures of sumo wrestling brothers Booma (the blonde-haired one, voiced by Matt Hill), Kimo (the Caucasian black-haired one, voiced by Ben Hur), and Mamoo (the black one, voiced by Cusse Mankuma). They live in a place called Generic City with their cousin Prima (voiced by Chantal Strand) and fight a corporation called Bad Inc., following the way of the "P.H.A.T.": Peace, Honor, And Truth.

Most people only know that Super Duper Sumos existed because cartoon reviewer RebelTaxi dubbed it the worst cartoon ever. And while I wouldn't go THAT far - shows like Planet Sheen exist, after all - after watching an episode I can confirm that it is indeed pretty bad. Why do I say that? Well, why don't we watch the eleventh episode, "Sumos on Ice", and I'll tell you just why Super Duper Sumos is anything BUT super. Let's get started...

The episode starts off at Bad Inc., where the main villain of the show, Ms. Mister (Deborah Demille), is giving the laboratory of mad scientist Dr. Stinger (Peter Kelamis) an inspection. Dr. Stinger totally has the hots for her - and I'm guessing he's not the only one, considering how the internet gets whenever there's an attractive female in a cartoon show (I'd be willing to bet that if you search "Super Duper Sumos" on DeviantArt, you'll mostly find pictures of her) - but she, for some strange reason, is not into the hunchbacked green-skinned weirdo who's clearly missing a few of his marbles. She tells him that she'd be happy to give him a kiss... when the world freezes over (she can't say "when that dark, firey place that rhymes with 'smell' freezes over", as the expression usually goes, because it's a kids' show).

That doesn't deter Dr. Stinger. He can, and will, make the world freeze over. If those Viking guys from Loonatics Unleashed couldn't do it, what makes him think HE'S got a shot?

Why are so many mad scientists in cartoons hunchbacked and/or green-skinned?
I wonder if he's related to the Angry Scientist from Sheep in the Big City...

Then we cut to the good guys watching a parade. Not just any parade, the Joe Bob Julliard House of Pies Twice Annual Big Honkin' Pie Parade, which Booma finds very exciting. It includes the largest cream pie ever made, accompanied by the mayor of Generic City and a seal (the Joe Bob Julliard House of Pies Seal of Approval. Get it?).

That's the largest cream pie ever made? I mean, it's big, but when I think of the largest cream pie ever made, I think of something, like, the size of a house. Not something that's not even larger than the car it's tied to. I mean, the largest Boston cream pie ever made was ten feet wide and weighed over a ton (no, really! Look it up!).

Hugh Neutron would probably love this parade.

Unbeknownst to the Super Duper Sumos, Dr. Stinger is flying over the parade in a helicopter, which he jumps out of - a parachute pops out of his hunch, which I'll admit is kind of funny. He lands on a pie-shaped blimp and claims it in the name of Ms. Mister, then he starts dousing it in Tasty Paste.

It's a Nickelodeon show, you should've expected green slime to pop up at SOME point...

"I will use this balloon to block out the sun!" Dr. Stinger exclaims. Jeez, how many times now have I reviewed something where the villain wanted to block out the sun? First the Hugeos in Josie and the Pussycats in Outer Space, then Dracula in Monster Family... don't cartoon villains realize the ramifications of blocking out the sun? For one thing, sundial sales would plummet!

"Let us leap into action!" Kimo declares, leading to a Power Rangers-esque transformation/suit up sequence... except the Super Duper Sumos aren't actually transforming or suiting up, they're just striking poses and shaking their butts. So... what was the point? Why not just immediately try to stop Dr. Stinger?

Don't worry, this isn't a fart joke. It just looks like one out of context.

To keep the Super Duper Sumos busy, Dr. Stinger throws down a smoke bomb that somehow brings the car carrying the "largest cream pie ever made" to life. And THIS sentient car isn't like Herbie the Love Bug or Benny the Cab, no, no... it's got sharp teeth, and it's not afraid to use them.

"Ka-chow, punks!"

Mamoo says that it's time to order up "a big heaping helping of sumo size". So they repeat the transformation/suit up sequence, meaning that we have to see Mamoo shaking his butt at us again (I'll spare you guys the screencap). Thanks for that. This time, however, they actually DO transform - sort of, they become more muscular. Why didn't they do that before, when they first saw Dr. Stinger stealing the blimp?

Some guys just shouldn't go shirtless.

Long story short, they save the mayor and the seal and defeat the evil sentient car. Booma eats the pie without even asking if anyone else would like some (how selfish). But Dr. Stinger manages to block out the sun with the blimp he stole, bringing on a new Ice Age.

"I WAS FROZEN TODAY!"

Everything on Earth is either frozen solid like Prima or covered with ice and snow - except for the Super Duper Sumos. I guess their sumo powers keep them warm or something like that. Booma says that he's going to get one of those big heat lamps for his butt, because butts are funny, right? "We're in some deep sushi!" Mamoo exclaims. "Of the frozen fish stick variety!" Kimo adds. There's only one thing to do: have a flashback.

The Super Duper Sumos flash back to when they were being trained by Wisdom San (Richard Newman), who sounds like Mel Brooks and is about seventy-five percent beard. He teaches them... how to make armpit farts. A skill that all sumo wrestlers should know. That, for those who couldn't tell, was sarcasm.

Hey, I think we've finally found Squidward's father!

Apparently, armpit farts generate heat, so the Super Duper Sumos do that to melt the ice around Prima. Now they just have to deal with the blimp. But first, Mamoo has to deal with the seal, who is apparently the strongest seal in the world because he can lift the very large and fat Mamoo into the air with just his nose.

...y'know what? This whole show should've been about him. Yep, this show would've been better if it were about a seal with tremendous strength fighting evil. "Super Duper Seal" has a nice ring to it.

Did you know that northern fur seals can outrun a human on slippery rocks and climb
nearly vertical cliffs? Hey, if I can't be funny, I think I should at least try to be educational.

Atop the pie-shaped blimp, Ms. Mister and Dr. Stinger are standing with Bad Inc. administrator Billy Swift (Michael Richard Dobson) - otherwise known as "BS", which coincidentally also describes most of what emerges from Donald Trump's mouth - and a ghostly entity by the name of Genghis Fangus (also Michael Richard Dobson). Since the world has frozen over, Ms. Mister and Dr. Stinger have to start smoochin', much to her disgust... or maybe not. Dr. Stinger's "sumo alarm" starts going off, alerting the bad guys of the good guys' presence. "One night only, for your entertainment..." Dr. Stinger says... "Sumos on Ice!"

With the press of a button, Dr. Stinger opens up a giant hole in the ice, from which emerge hockey stick-armed robots wearing football helmets. "Let us put the ICE-ing on this hockey cake!" Kimo says. You've really gotta work on your one-liners, Kimo. The Super Duper Sumos wind up slipping on the ice before they can do any actual damage, bringing to mind the words "EPIC FAIL". Fortunately, Prima is apparently an expert hockey player, because she manages to take down the robots herself. I see we have another character who would've made a much better main protagonist than the sumo wrestlers...

Maybe the seal could've been her sidekick.

Then it's time for the Super Duper Sumos to do a "sumo swirl", which is them locking arms and spinning around on the ice, sending the robots flying when they try to attack. Then Prima sends them all flying into the net. Has she considered trying out for the Toronto Maple Leafs?

And then who should show up again but the OTHER best character in the episode, the seal, much to Mamoo's horror. You see, he's afraid of seals because when the Super Duper Sumos were babies and Wisdom San took them to the zoo, a seal caused Mamoo to lose his churro. Seals: destroyers of churros. Apathetic to his brother's plight, Booma gets hungry and runs over to a penguin-shaped ice cream stand - which Dr. Sting promptly zaps with a satellite dish, turning it into an evil robo-penguin!

"I HAVE BEEN SENT TO PUNISH THOSE WHO DID NOT SEE MARCH OF
THE PENGUINS IN THEATERS. YOU WILL PAY FOR GOING TO SEE THE ADVENTURES
OF SHARKBOY AND LAVAGIRL INSTEAD."

Booma, Mamoo, and Kimo have their giant rear ends handed to them by the robo-penguin, trapping them and Prima in a giant snowball. Fortunately, the seal frees them with his super-strength, and then Prima comes up with a plan. A plan that involves the Super Duper Sumos going "sumo size", which means we get that stupid transformation/suit up sequence AGAIN - and then the Super Duper Sumos send the robo-penguin flying (which is ironic, seeing as it's a penguin and all). And where does it fly? Right into the blimp, popping it. The blimp deflates, the sun is unblocked, and all the ice and snow starts to melt. And then Mamoo accidentally sends the seal flying, too.

As for the bad guys, they wind up on top of a mountain, where Ms. Mister tricks Dr. Stinger into kissing the robo-penguin.

Meh, still a better love story than Bee Movie.

The seal lands on top of the robo-penguin and starts balancing Dr. Stinger on his nose. And that's it. That's how it ends. Whee.

What's the Verdict?

After this and The Super Mario Bros. Super Show, I think I've figured something out: if a cartoon is made by DiC Entertainment and it has the word "Super" in the title, there's not much of substance.

Yeah, I'm sorry, but this was pretty lame. For one thing, none of the jokes (aside from the parachute emerging from Dr. Stinger's hunch) were funny - fat people, naked people, and butts are not automatically funny, in order for them to be funny you need good writing. You can't just shove a fat naked guy at the screen and expect to get a laugh. The characters are mostly one-note, and in the case of Booma kind of annoying. The only characters I actually liked were Prima and the Seal, why couldn't the show have been about them? The animation is fine, I guess. The voice actors are doing their best. But it's pretty easy to see why this only got one season. Nickelodeon was airing far better cartoons - produced in-house, too - at the time. Of course, it was also airing Butt-Ugly Martians, so we can't say it wasn't airing worse cartoons as well.

If you'd like to watch Super Duper Sumos for yourself, you can find episodes on YouTube. There have also been DVD releases, most of which are likely out of print but could probably be found on eBay. But don't say I didn't warn you.

This review has been brought to you by...

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Let's Watch This: An Episode of "The Super Mario Bros. Super Show"

NOTE: Please do not take any of the little nitpicks in this review (or any of my other reviews, for that matter) seriously. I write these reviews in the hopes of making people laugh. Those nitpicks are really just dumb little observations that I'm attempting to make jokes out of, not complaints that add to whether or not I like something.

NOTE #2: No disrespect is meant towards anyone who worked on the show I am reviewing today. I'm sure they are all very nice and talented people.

NOTE #3: If you like this show, that is great. Go ahead and like it. I'm not judging you.

Hey, paisanos! We're reviewing The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!

You're probably familiar with this show already if you spend a lot of time on the internet. The Super Mario Bros. Super Show premiered in syndication on September 4th, 1989, created by Andy Heyward for Nintendo, Saban Entertainment, and DIC Enterprises. In fact, this was the first of THREE cartoons starring the iconic plumber to be created by DIC. Maybe we'll review the other two cartoons another time, maybe we won't. We'll see.

Each episode started and ended with a live action segment starring Mario and Luigi, portrayed in both animation and live action by Captain Lou Albano and Danny Wells respectively. This would show their lives in Brooklyn before they arrived in the Mushroom Kingdom, doing odd jobs for folks like Dr. Frankenstein, Inspector Gadget, and Cyndi Lauper. Sandwiched in between these live action bits were an animated segment where Mario and Luigi would help Princess Peach... I mean, Toadstool (voiced by Jeannie Elias) and her servant Toad (John Stocker) protect the Mushroom Kingdom from the evil Bowser... I mean, King Koopa (Harvey Atkin). The writers mostly used this as an excuse to do spoofs of various books, films, what have you.

Apparently, Nintendo was reluctant to do the show from the start and decided to end the show after production of the first season (consisting of sixty-three episodes) - which is why DIC made two more shows based on Super Mario Bros 3. and Super Mario World instead of just making more seasons of THIS show. Today, The Super Mario Bros. Super Show is mostly well-known for how corny it supposedly is. Ah yes, and every episode released on Friday had an animated segment based on The Legend of Zelda instead. I'm going to review an episode that doesn't have a Legend of Zelda segment because I've never played any of those games, ergo I don't think I'm a good choice to review an episode of a show adapting them.

Actually, we'll be reviewing the sixth episode, which consists of the segments "The Mario Monster Mash" and "Rolling Down the River". Does The Super Mario Bros. Super Show live up to the "hype"? Let's find out!

Let's Watch This: An Episode of "The Buzz on Maggie"

I have a confession to make. I'm afraid of flies. All bugs, really, but especially flies. I don't know why, I think it's a combination of the buzzing sound they make and those big compound eyes. Those compound, pupilless eyes. I know they're harmless, but they just scare the bejabbers out of me. So it's fortunate for me that this show starring flies makes them cartoony enough to NOT give me the willies.

The Buzz on Maggie premiered on Disney Channel in June 2005, the creation of South Park writer Dave Polsky. Taking place in the tiny inset-populated town of Stickyfeet, the show focused on an energetic teenage girl fly named Maggie Pesky, voiced by Jessica DiCicco (one of her first voice acting roles), who aspires to be a rock star. She attends junior high school and has to deal with typical teenage girl problems like babysitting her younger siblings, having a crush on her math tutor, dealing with the popular girl in school who hates her guts because she's not rich like her... y'know, basically the same stuff Penny Proud was already dealing with, except Penny was human whereas Maggie was a bug.

Maggie was designed by Dave Wasson of Time Squad fame (note to self: do a review of Time Squad at some point), who also served as a director on the show. In an interview with Animation Magazine, Dave said that he was influenced by Disney, Tex Avery, and Warner Brothers cartoons from the 1930s, which is why the characters wear white gloves. Maggie's home town of Stickyfeet is also located in a dump because, as he put it - "As an animator, that concept gives you a lot of visual opportunities. Who can resist building a whole city out of garbage?!"

Only one season of The Buzz on Maggie was produced, consisting of twenty-one episodes (each one consisting of two segments). The show received mostly positive reviews from critics, the show got the flyswatter when it had only been on the air for two months because it was doing lousily overseas. Then it was only aired at night, when most kids would likely be asleep, until 2008 when it was pulled from the schedule, pretty much torpedoing any chance of the show finding a new audience and maybe getting at least one more season. Oh, and only three episodes were released on DVD as part of an extremely rare promotional kit and it's not on Disney Plus. Fortunately, you can find episodes of the show on YouTube.

Today, The Buzz on Maggie is at best a cult classic. As for me, I remember watching the show when it was on, though I haven't watched it since it aired on TV so I don't know how well it holds up. We'll be watching the show's ninth episode, which consists of the segments "Slumber Party" and "Spelling Bees", to see if this is another cartoon that deserved better or if Disney made the right call taking a can of Raid to it. Let's get started!

"Slumber Party" begins at the Pesky family's milk carton house...

I guess the straw sticking out the top functions as a chimney? If so, that's a nice touch...

Maggie's loving but (in her opinion) embarrassing parents Chauncey (voiced by Brian Doyle-Murray) and Frieda (voiced by Susan Tolsky) are taking their eldest child Adrian (David "Danny Fenton" Kaufman) to his "flyball" (which is kind of like football, except they call it "flyball" because they're flies) game. Maggie is left at home to take care of her younger brother Pupert (Thom Adcox-Hernandez) until her parents and Adrian return the next day. Maggie is all "Oh, yeah, I'll be totally responsible!". Is she being honest, or is she secretly planning to do something totally IRRESPONSIBLE since she's a teenage girl and they're not exactly known for their responsibility? You be the judge!

Unlike most anthropomorphic cartoon bugs, the ones in this show have six legs (well,
two legs and four arms, anyway). Points for insect anatomy accuracy.

Now, you'd expect Maggie to do what ALL teenagers usually do when their parents go out on vacation and throw some sort of party, which usually leads to the parents arriving home early and discovering what's going on and the teenager getting in hot water. But nope, Maggie straight-up tells her parents that she's invited her best friend Rayna (Cree Summer) over to spend the night. "Instead of ONE set of eyes on Pupert, we'll have TWO!" she explains. "He'll never be out of our sight for one single second!"

Her parents aren't sold, but Maggie insists that she can handle it, asking "What could possibly go wrong?" You'd think she'd know that saying "What could possibly go wrong?" is a pretty good way of ensuring that anything that COULD possibly go wrong DOES go wrong. Chauncey seems to think so too, seeing as he imagines them arriving home to discover that their house is missing. Sheesh, what does he expect, that Maggie and Rayna will somehow knock down the walls?

I don't think this is even Maggie's fault. Maybe a sanitation worker picked it up and
put it in a recycling bin.

Once Chauncy, Frieda, and Adrian leave, Maggie calls up Rayna and tells her that the sleepover is off because her parents don't think it's a good idea. But, she decides, them just saying that it's not a good idea doesn't exactly mean "no", does it? Plus, the only way she can prove that she's responsible enough to have a sleepover when they're not home is to actually have a sleepover when they're not home, right? So the sleepover is back on, despite Pupert's pointing out that their parents told Maggie it wasn't a good idea and imagining himself tattling on her as soon as they get home.

This is where all Disney Channel characters go after their shows get cancelled. Dave the Barbarian
is in the cell next to Maggie's.

Maggie tells Pupert that he'll get to be the "documentarian", whose job is to take pictures of the quiet, responsible sleepover, allowing Maggie to have proof that she's responsible and allowing her to do a lot more cool stuff from now on. I'm sensing a flaw on Maggie's plan, but teenage girls aren't exactly known for their rational thinking.

Pupert still wants to tattle on her, but Maggie tells him to think "big picture" - if she gets away with this, just think about what HE'LL be able to get away with when he's her age. This is what he imagines...

His parents don't let him go on kiddy rides? The fiends!

So Pupert agrees. Maggie hands him a camera... remember when people actually used cameras? Now we all just take photos with our phones. Rayna arrives at the house, and she brought some guests with her: droopy-eyed moths. They're bummed because they live in a constant state of indecision: should they eat their own clothing, or continue holding up the laws of insect decency and risk starvation?

Yes, I'm aware that moths don't actually eat clothing (their larvae do), but come on,
it's not like they WEAR clothing either so why bring realism into this review NOW?

Maggie calls out Rayna for not telling her that she was bringing guests. Rayna explains that they're the daughters of her father's army buddies and she's been stuck entertaining them all day long, but they're not gonna cause any trouble.

The girls watch a movie, have a way fun but totally safe pillow fight, do each other's nails (putting the polish on their gloves, amusingly enough), and order a pizza... which makes me wonder, if they're flies, do they use garbage as pizza toppings? Or, seeing as they construct buildings out of garbage, would that be like eating bricks and concrete? Eventually, it starts to get dark, and Maggie turns on a lamp. And you know how moths get around lights in the dark...

Pictured: how people react to whatever live action remake Disney is throwing their way.

"Ooh, it's just like the animated movie, but it's with REAL PEOPLE and TERRIFYING CGI!
I must give Bob Iger all of my money!"

Yes, when night falls onto the fair city of Stickyfeet, nocturnal bugs like moths start acting like they've just chugged fifty Red Bulls (how do you think they get their wings?). Maggie apparently didn't know that moths were nocturnal, which you'd think would be common knowledge in a city of anthropomorphic bugs, but whatever. Not only will the moths' being nocturnal make the "slumber" part of "slumber party" very difficult, but it also means no pizza for Maggie, Pupert, and Rayna - as soon as it shows up, the moths devour it (and the pizza delivery bug's dignity).

I know the episode is going to frame this as being Maggie's fault, but to be fair,
how was she supposed to know that Rayna would bring uninvited guests with her?

"Rayna, you brought these moths! DO SOMETHING!" Maggie yells as the moths start dancing to FUN-KAY music and making a mess of the house. Rayna is powerless against the flies, so it's up to Maggie to kick out the moths... or at least she tries to, she quickly turns out to be powerless against them too. Especially when they summon MORE moths...

Pictured: people showing up at the movie theaters when whatever live action remake
Disney is throwing their way next is released. I swear, if that Lilo and Stitch remake is
successful enough for Disney to greenlight a "live action" remake of Zootopia or something...

Chaos ensues as the moths take over Maggie's house. And in this situation, there's only one responsible thing to do: hide in the closet, where Maggie, Pupert, and Rayna find a moth who has eaten all of the clothing inside. See? I'm not the only one who makes jokes about moths eating clothing.

I didn't know moths had belly buttons.

Fortunately, the moths finally leave in the morning before the other Peskys arrive home. Unfortunately, they've made a huge mess of the house. "I guess my parents were right. I wasn't ready to have a sleepover when they weren't home," Maggie laments, even though the situation that led to the house getting trashed was out of her control (Rayna didn't have to bring the moths with her, did she?). It's time for Plan B: clean up the house, destroy all the evidence, and act like it never happened. But she'd better clean up the house quickly, because her parents' car is approaching!

Maggie and Rayna clean up the house via a montage, but there's still one thing they have to take care of: all the photos Pupert's been taking!

Cue the dramatic music.

Pupert agrees to keep the party their little secret after Maggie bribes him with lots and lots of candy. The parents and Aldrin arrive back home, but wouldn't you know it? Chauncey and Frieda notice the stack of photos behind Maggie and decide to start looking at them. The episode irises out before we see their horrified reactions, but hopefully they at least give Maggie a chance to explain before sending her to Teenage Girl Jail.

The next segment, "Spelling Bee", starts off at Stickyfeet International Airport... and oh look, the bugs' planes are made from bottles. That's pretty funny.

Wouldn't airplanes be kind of redundant for bugs, seeing as most of them can fly?

A huge crowd has gathered at the airport to see the arrival of Maggie's favorite spelling team, the Spelling Bees... who look like the Beatles for some reason? You'd think they would've had their parody of the Beatles be, y'know, beetles. Maybe they thought that was too obvious?

And why would a group that competes in a spelling competition be a parody of the Beatles?
Did the Beatles regularly take part in spelling bees?

The Spelling Bees consist of Floyd, Nigel, Quentin and Stingo - and Maggie and Rayna want to become the fifth and sixth members. But what's this? Stingo gets laryngitis just before the Spelling Bees are to participate in a spelling competition against a group of Praying Mantises. Now they'll have to forfeit!

...or WILL they? Maggie's got an I-D-E-A. We cut to them at some building called the Golden Fleabag, dressed as bees... I wonder if this is considered the insect equivalent of blackface.

"Now, remember, Rayna: our favorite colors are brown and yellow, we love Honey Nut
Cheerios, we're always busy, and whenever the opportunity to make a bee pun arises,
we take it. Got all that?"

Maggie's plan is foolproof: she'll audition to be the Spelling Bee's new member. Rayna's posing as her groupie/agent. The Spelling Bees give Maggie a test by having her spell really long words like "dyspepsia" and "flagellum" (and thank goodness she spells them, because otherwise I would have no idea how to!), then take her and Rayna out to do stuff that famous bugs do. Like head inside the local florist shop and swim in the pollen without paying, for example!

Just looking at that pollen is messing with my allergies!

So now Maggie is an official Spelling Bee, but Rayna is upset by the way the Spelling Bees treat other bugs. They seem to be under the impression that being famous gives you the right to be a tool (make your own joke here). So outraged is Rayna that she tears off her bee disguise and reveals herself to be a fly. And what does Maggie do? Does she agree with Rayna and suggest that the Spelling Bees be nicer without revealing herself to be a fly as well, which should increase her chances of not getting kicked out but still help the Spelling Bees to bee-come (couldn't resist) better people... er, bugs? Nope. She gasps and says, "You're a FLY?! I've... I've been HOODWINKED! HOODWINKED, I SAY! How dare you!"

Rayna storms off, and then we cut to the spelling competition that night. I had to share a screencap of those praying mantises that the Spelling Bees are competing against:

"We're praying that we'll win!"

The first word that the Spelling Bees have to spell is "egocentric"... oh, the irony. Soon, the mantises are ahead by two points, and it's up to Maggie to ensure the bees get two points as well and the competition goes into overtime. The other Spelling Bees point out to Maggie how stupid their fans look, especially that one group in Section G, Row 6 - wait a minute, that's Rayna and Maggie's family! Not sure why Rayna attended seeing as she hates the Spelling Bees now. Maybe it was solely to guilt-trip Maggie?

She needs an "I Really Wish I Weren't Here Right Now" button.

To further guilt-trip Maggie, the next word she has to spell is "imposter". When she asks for a definition, the host says, "A fake, a phony, a trickster if you will - a lying waste of exoskeleton who would betray and sell out her own kind!". The shame is gnawing at Maggie like a caterpillar gnaws on leaves. Glancing over at the Spelling Bees, Maggie says, "Imposter... I-M... imposter... I-M... I AM... AN IMPOSTER! ME! MAGGIE! M-A-G-G-I-E! M-A-G-G-I-E! M-A-G-G-I-EEEEEEEE-HEEEEEEE!" Everyone gasps. "I'm not a bee! I'm a FLY!" Maggie continues, tearing off her bee disguise.

"I thought that my lavender-colored head would be enough to give it away! Everybody knows
that bees have YELLOW-colored heads!"

"We lose because of some STINKIN' FLY?!" Floyd yells. "It FIGURES! YOU FLIES HAVE BEEN A BUNCH OF BOGGY, ROTTEN, PESTS EVER SINCE WE LANDED IN THIS RANCID LITTLE STINKTOWN!" This, of course, is a really dumb thing to say. The crowd starts pelting the Spelling Bees with what I think is either mud or crap. Rayna and Maggie's family are proud of her for doing the right thing, Maggie apologizes to Rayna, and the mantises are dubbed the winners while the Spelling Bees are chased out by an angry mob. The moral of today's story is that bees are the scum of the earth. Not that we didn't already know that. After all, they sting people!

What's the Verdict?

Y'know, I honestly really liked this. First of all, I give the show credit in that this could've very easily been another generic "kids in school dealing with their first world problems" cartoon, but unlike Birdz, they actually take advantage of the fact that the characters are not human. I mean, the second episode alone tackles racism in a very different way than a show starring humans would've. You couldn't have a white person disguise themselves as a person of color, that would just be offensive. Combine that with some genuinely funny jokes, interesting characters, and some great voice acting from folks like Jessica DiCicco and Cree Summer, and you've got a fun show. My one complaint is that the Flash animation, per usual of Flash animation in the 2000s, is mediocre. Still, I enjoyed watching The Buzz on Maggie and it's a pity that it only got one season. Chalk it up as another Disney cartoon that we should've gotten more of. I'm still bitter over how they treated Wander Over Yonder myself...

And now, a word from our sponsor. This review has been brought to you by the newest film from DreamWorks Animation - the long-awaited sequel to their iconic 2007 film Bee Movie...

Bee Movie 2 marks the triumphant return of Barry B. Benson, the bee who made his mark on the world by suing the entire human race. He and his human girlfriend... what was her name again? Oh, right, Vanessa... have finally decided to tie the knot. But first, they'll have to fight to get bee/human marriage legalized! Get it?! It's a metaphor!

Jerry Seinfeld and Renee Zellweger will be reprising their roles, as will Chris Rock, Matthew Broderick, Kathy Bates, Barry Levinson, and John Goodman as that fat lawyer guy, who has returned to seek revenge on Barry by fighting AGAINST bee/human marriage! Also joining the cast as new characters are Awkwafina, Sabrina Carpenter, James Corden, Flula Borg, Jason Statham, Timothee Chalamet, Maya Rudolph, and even Bee Movie superfan Doug Walker as internet celebrity Bee Doug Walker. Lin-Manuel Miranda has been tapped to write seven original songs for the film, among them "Do You Bee-lieve in Miracles?", "Squash That Bee", and the spine-tingling romantic ballad that is "You're Sweeter Than Honey".

Will Barry and Vanessa make the world a safe place for homo sapiens and apis mellifera to wed? Will Patrick Warburton's character, Ken, get the therapy he so desperately needs? Is the house of Ethyl, the new ladybug character that Awkwafina lends her voice to, actually on fire? And are her children home? Is Barry, in fact, "her little bed bug"? Bee Movie fans rejoice! All of these questions and more will be answered in the blockbuster event of the summer, Bee Movie 2! Flying to a theater near you!

DISCLAIMER: This is not an actual movie. DreamWorks has not announced that they are making a sequel to Bee Movie. The review that you have just read is not actually brought to you by anything. Ever since my review of Sheep in the Big City, I have gotten the idea to put fake ads in reviews whenever I can't think of a genuinely funny way that is relevant to whatever I just reviewed to end it on. The chances of them actually making a sequel to Bee Movie are very, very small. Do not actually expect to see a trailer for Bee Movie 2 in front of the next kids' movie you go see. Please don't sue me. I do not have a lawyer.

Let's Watch This: "Life is a Circus, Charlie Brown" (1980)

NOTE: Please do not take any of the little nitpicks in this review (or any of my other reviews, for that matter) seriously. I write these reviews in the hopes of making people laugh. Those nitpicks are really just dumb little observations that I'm attempting to make jokes out of, not complaints that add to whether or not I like something.

NOTE #2: No disrespect is meant towards anyone who worked on the special I am reviewing today. I'm sure they are all very nice and talented people.

NOTE #3: If you like this special, that is great. Go ahead and like it. I'm not judging you.

Who wants to talk about another Peanuts TV special? I do!

By the 1980s, the folks making these Charlie Brown specials probably realized that they'd run out of holidays. There was a Christmas special, a Halloween special, a Thanksgiving special, an Easter special, even an Arbor Day special. And presumably, they realized that folks would think A Charlie Brown Cinco De Mayo was a dumb idea... actually, what WOULD that special be like? Would Snoopy have some sort of stereotypical Mexican alter ego? In what way would Charlie Brown get put the wringer?

Well, anyhow, before they started recycling holidays (I personally like It's Christmastime Again, Charlie Brown and I Want a Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown, but I know I'm probably in the minority), the folks making these specials started whipping up specials with plotlines that probably would've worked better for episodes of The Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show than full-length specials. Though, to be fair, they were doing this as far back as 1974 - It's a Mystery, Charlie Brown isn't anything to write home about.

Long story short, at one point somebody asked, "What if Snoopy decided to join the circus?" and that's how we got Life is a Circus, Charlie Brown. This is one of those specials that you rarely see people talk about. Airing on CBS on October 24th, 1980, the only truly noteworthy things about it are that A) it won an Emmy for Outstanding Animated Program and B) it introduced a character named Fifi, who would appear again years later in The Peanuts Movie. Oh, and it was one of the first Peanuts specials to be released on VHS.

I have never seen this special before. As a rule of thumb, if it never aired on TV at any point in the 2000s, chances are it's a Peanuts special that I've never seen (unless it was included as a bonus feature on the DVD of one of the holiday specials, like It's Arbor Day, Charlie Brown was). But what luck, it's on Apple TV, so I can watch it now and do a review of it. Is Life is a Circus, Charlie Brown good? Let's find out, shall we?